Hey! Guys welcome to my channel Novelchitchat this is Tanya and today will be talking about “The Four Agreements” by Don Miguel Ruiz. This book has four agreements that are totally game-changer and this book is basically for the people like me who take every little thing straight to their heart.
So, if you are one of them so stay tuned.
The first agreement that we need to do with ourselves is be impeccable with your word. The word is the most powerful tool we have as human. It is a tool of magic but at the same time misuse of a word is a black magic. The word is so powerful that one word can change a life or destroy the lives of millions of people. Now, let us understand this concept more clearly. As children we didn’t have the opportunity to choose our beliefs but we agreed with the information that was passed to us from our parents or our society siblings etc. And that’s how we learn as children.
Children believe everything adults say.
We agree with them and our faith is so strong that the our belief system control our whole dream of life and I call this process as the domestication of human. Through domestication we learn how to live and how to dream. So, if I’ll be using the word further like domestication then it means the belief that we follow since childhood and after listening all these things since childhood we just make a agreement in our mind regarding these beliefs. During our domestication our parents and siblings gave their opinion about us without even thinking and we simply believe these opinions and we live in a fear over these opinions for the whole life and it affects us.
The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz – Book Review
( Don’t Miss To Watch Top Video )
Like and Share
For example:-
If someone gives opinion about a girl and say look, this girl is ugly. So, the girl listens, believes that she is ugly and grows up with the idea that she is ugly. It doesn’t matter how beautiful she is as long as she has that agreement she’ll believe that she is ugly and that is the spell she’s under. By hooking our attention the word can enter our mind and change a whole belief for better or for worse. Now let’s look at one more example for more clearance:- So, once there was a woman, who was very intelligent and had a good heart. She had a beautiful daughter. One night this woman came home from a very bad day at work tired and with a terrible headache.
The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz
All she wanted at present was a peace of mind but her daughter was singing loudly and jumping happily. The daughter was unaware of how her mother was feeling. She was in her own world but all this made her mother’s headache even worse and she lost control somehow. Angrily she looked at her daughter and said shut up! you have an ugly voice can you just shut up?. And after listening this daughter believed what her mother said and in that moment she made an agreement with herself.
After that she no longer sang because she believed that her voice was ugly. Everything got changed in her life due to this new agreement this spell was cast upon her by the one who loved her the most her own mother. Her mother didn’t notice that she used the black magic against her and put a spell on her daughter. She didn’t know the power of the word and destroyed her own daughter’s life.
So, this was the first agreement that says that use the word in a correct way else don’t.
Stop complaining, criticizing and gossiping. Use the word to share love, not hatred. Now the next three agreements are really born from the first agreement so the second agreement is don’t take things personally whatever happens around you don’t take anything personally for example:- If I see you on street one day and I say, Hey! You are stupid, without knowing you then It’s not about you it’s about me. If you take it personally then perhaps you believe that you were stupid or maybe you think to yourself that how does she know?. You take it personally because you agree with whatever I said and you got trapped in the hell and this happens because at the time of our domestication in childhood we learn to take things personally.
We happily accept everything like who’s responsible for everything?
Me, me of course me. And this thing actually should not bother us even if other person insults you directly it has nothing to do with you. What they say, what they do and the opinion they give are according to the agreement they have received during their domestication. Taking things personally can hook you easily with one little opinion and feed you whatever poison they want and because you take it personally, you eat it up.
You eat all their emotional garbage and now it becomes your garbage.
Don’t take anything personally because by taking things personally you set yourself to suffer for nothing. Humans are addicted to suffering at different levels and to different degrees but we support each other in maintaining these addictions. Just by practicing this second agreement you began to break dozens of tiny agreement that cause you to suffer. “How people treat you is the projection of who they are” that is why it doesn’t make sense to ever take anything personally.
So, just trust yourself and “Live more! Care less!”
And here comes the third agreement that is don’t make assumptions we have the tendency to make assumptions about everything and the problem is we believe that they are the truth. We make an assumption, we misunderstood, we take it personally and we end up creating the whole big drama for nothing. All the sadness and drama you have lived in your life was rooted in making assumptions and taking things personally. It is always better to ask question than to make an assumption.
Let’s look at one example:-
Suppose there is a newlywed couple and the wife make assumption about her partner that her partner see is the marriage the same way as she do. Then they live together and she finds out that this is not true and due to this she got disturbed. Husband comes from work and the wife is mad at him and the husband doesn’t know why maybe because the wife made an assumption without telling him what she wants. She make an assumption that he knows her so well and he know what she wants, as if he can read the mind.
She gets so upset because he fails to meet her expectations.
Making assumptions in relationship leads to a lot of fights, a lots of difficulties, lots of misunderstandings with the people we love. And we make assumptions as we don’t have the courage to ask questions, we assume that others think the way we think, feel the way we feel, judge the way we judge and abuse the way we abuse and that is the biggest assumptions we human make.
So, stop making assumptions. With clear communication all of your relationship will change. You won’t need to make assumptions because everything becomes so clear. All human problem would be resolved if we could find a just one good clear communication.
Build up the skill and the courage to communicate and you will easily turn hatred towards you into respect and
loyalty. Now the fourth and the last agreement is always do your best, this agreement says under any circumstance always do your best. No more and no less but keep in mind that your best is never going to be the same way like it can change from moment to moment.
Everything is alive and changing all the Time.
So, your best will sometimes be very high-quality and the other time it will not be as good. Your best actually depends on whether you are feeling wonderful or happy or upset angry or jealous but well just do your best in any circumstance in your life regardless of the quality, keep doing best. By doing this you will not judge yourself and if you don’t judge then there is no way that you will Suffer from guilt, blame or self Punishment. By doing your best, you are going to be very productive. You’re going to be very good to yourself. So,
be your-self and love yourself.
You don’t need to know or prove anything to anyone say “No” when you want to say “No” and yes! when you want to say yes!. You have the right to be YOU. You can only be you when you do your best. The first three agreements will only work if you do your best.
The four agreements are actually a summary of mastery of transformation in which you transform yourself from Hell to heaven. So, if you are impeccable with your word, if you don’t take things personally, if you don’t make assumptions and if you do your best, trust me you are going to have a beautiful life ahead and you are going to control your life 100%.
#FourAgreements #TheFourAgreementsbyDonMiguelRuiz
For more updates do visit our channel Novelchitchat and Subscribe to it! Thank-you.
If I talk about Myself then I basically like the Motivational and Self-help books.
so best that you can read if not yet are:-
1.) Rich Dad Poor Dad by Robert Kiyosaki:- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vpV4ck7pves&t=2s
2.)The Subtle Art of Not Giving A Fuck by Mark Manson: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d9t612013Dw&t=9s
3.)The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari by Robin Sharma:- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J2BAGpF8TN4&t=22s
The Four Agreements,success,happy,agreement,parents,feelings,video,friends,four agreements summary,four agreements full audiobook,four agreements don miguel ruiz,four agreements full audiobook in hindi,four agreements book review,four agreements martin roth,four agreements second agreement,four agreements intro,four agreements review,four agreements in English,four agreements book pdf,4 agreements,4 agreements meditation,4 agreements, 4 agreements audible Tempo Traveller Services